Why this disgrace of a movie is constantly on Blockbuster shelf, I will never know. Lynch hired actors who are clearly not made for the big screen, with nerdy and potato-faced Kyle MacLachlan as a poor excuse for a hero and the Police’s Sting as the worst villain I’ve ever seen on screen. The plot was a total mess with some absurd inner monologues projected to the audience with barely any context to the actual storyline. It was ugly, unstructured, and pointless in one of the most confusing screenplays of all time which, again, resulted in a real mess of a movie. The De Laurentiis producers sloppily cut thousands of feet of footage out of Lynch’s final product before the release of the movie; this clearly showed in the shabby special effects that were thrown into it. Despite their hopes that the mixing of some actors, sets, and some useless screenplay would be a success, it causes audiences to strip themselves from the anticipation.
If “Dune” was Lynch’s Big Break as a filmmaker, then I can’t even imagine the trash he’s developed in the past. The dump Lynch created deserved all the excruciating criticisms, because it just looked like it was thrown together with no real plan in motion. However, instead of destroying Lynch’s reputation as a producer, even though he should’ve given up from the start, you gotta give the guy credit for somewhat sticking around and influencing producers who were actually successful in their move productions.
The main stylistic change I made in rewriting this excerpt was the word choice. I used a lot of the word choice that the first text used, such as “strip [themselves] from the anticipation” and “a real mess.” I made the decision to make this change because to me, that was the most unique characteristic about text 1 and therefore it seemed the easiest to incorporate into the rewrite for text 2. This change greatly adjusted the tone of the excerpt by emphasizing the childish nature and highlight the immaturity that was present from text 1. It made the criticisms on the movie and Lynch more personal and offensive by the disasters that were associated with the movie. In addition, it decreases the credibility of the voice because it does not hold a level of sophistication that would persuade the audience to view the movie like the author had. I also added a lot more critiques about the movie in the rewrite because that was the main focus of text 1, but still implemented the details regarding the producer and his contributions to the movie. This mostly affects the type of audience that this rewrite would attract: moviegoers, people who pay more attention to the actual details of the movie instead of brisking through it, which also means the genre of the text would change to more of a review instead of a biography. Finally, another change I made was the syntax. I implemented multiple run-on sentences, which also contributes to the childish tone and takes away the little formality that the second text had.
Lucia's Writing Progress 